August 16

Good judgment proves that you are wise, and if you speak kindly, you can teach others. Proverbs 16:21 (cev)

As I mentioned yesterday, my quest for financial peace has sparked a personal growth revolution in me and one of my goals as a father is to impart the things I am learning now to my children. Its one of those "If I knew then..." ideas that makes me want to transfer a little of my "now" to their "then".

My son (8) is stubborn--so stubborn that I often become reactive to his strong-willed attempts to challenge my authority. So instead of bestowing wisdom (by speaking kindly), we usually have a war of words that frustrates us both. (Occasionally, we can have a deep conversation in which understanding is attained.)

I love my son (and daughter) dearly and I only want what is best for him. Also, I know I can't control him either--I can only guide and coach him through life. When I am reactive to his "childishness"(after all, he's just a kid), I lose precious teachable moments. I am placing self-imposed "trip hazards" between me and my fatherhood goals.

Which brings me back to my lack of good judgment and proof that I am not yet wise. (It's a vicious cycle once you're in it.) But it reminds me of a story:
One day a grandchild asked his grandfather how he had gotten so wise. The grandfather replied that he was wise because he had good judgment. After pondering this, the grandchild asked how you get good judgment to which the grandfather replied, "From experience." Quickly the child asked "How do you get experience?" The grandfathers answer: "By not being wise."

At least I'm on the right track.

By the way, my relationship with my son has taught me more about my relationship with God. He's crazy about me and he only wants what's best for me. I've got good news: He feels the same way about you.